Tuesday, March 06, 2007

In case you were confused

Dear Boys/Guys/Men or whatever you've decided you wanted to be called,

If you are out with a group of people and you are drinking and carousing and making merriment in general and there is a girl with whom you have a very hard-to-define-will-they-won't-they-she's-up-all-night-dissecting-conversations-with-her-friends relationship and you turn to her after a few beverages and say, "Hey you wanna get out of here?"

She is automatically, automatically going to think that you want to take her home, or in the very least- maybe make out with her on the street.

Seriously?! Seriously.

If she is 24-or-less-months out of college, and she's had a few, and you have a beautiful smile and tell her she's funny and you say the words,

"Hey, you wanna get out of here?"

Her brain is going to go NUTS. I don't know why those words have secret-spell-powers, but they do. She gets over it soon enough, but that little sensation lingers far too long for any sort of comfort. So please, use them with caution because the mental anguish you cause with those little bastards is kind of out of control.


Love and kisses,

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She's pint-sized and amazing.