Monday Meals. Gimme all your breads.

We made it through Lent. I feel like ALL I have talked about for the past 40 days is what I have been eating. It has been tedious and I am very excited to not have it be examined quite so closely going forward.

I celebrated Easter with a bundle of good people and some amazing bites from the bread family including:

-ginger ale waffles with walnuts and dried cranberries
-lemon curd bread (this did not go so well, but even with the wrong yeast it was so crazy delicious)
-grapefruit poppy seed bread (get in this. yum.)

I am so happy to be eating bread again, but my stomach is a hot mess. HOT MESS. Ergh.

I feel like at the end of the day, bread (and all its friends) are important and wonderful, but my body has had an amazing reaction to not eating them by shedding about 20 pounds in 40 days. So while I refuse to stop eating them for forever, it is intoxicating to know this about the power of food.

And while Boyfriend will tell you, vehemently, that this is not a lifestyle he has any interest in continuing for forever, it is worth a shot to give up the unnecessary carbs - the ones that aren't delicious super special cupcakes or homemade bread or pasta with Nonna sauce. Its worth it to feel so good about my body, I think.  We'll see.

But for now - no more talking about food. He has risen (indeed), lets talk about other things.

Passing the Bar

This weekend I went to this amazing politics and television festival that was basically six or so hours spent ogling my favorite on-screen people and listening to them talk about how amazing they and their work are - not lying it was a 2014 highlight for sure.

On my way to the festival I panicked about having enough food to eat- 12 pm-6 pm is a tricky time, especially on a Saturday when I don't even think about breakfast until well past 9:45 am.

I ducked into one of Hyde Park's fancy coffee shop market places and hemmed and hawed about what would be the best choice for a carb-ish/gluten-ish free snack.

I stumbled upon a whole shelf of bars and scooped up all three of these in the name of science and the small hope that some sort of natural disaster would hit and Bradley Whitford would need to share my Kind bar.

What ended up happening was one crazy Saturday and the a crazy Monday and Tuesday. This experiment could not have come at a better time as I haven't managed to be doing anything except working or sleeping for more than 30 minutes the past few days.

I was delighted to find that all three of these bars taste pretty fantastic. I purposefully got peanut butter and coconut flavored ones as those are always dominate flavors that do a good job of masking all the healthy business.

The Jimmy Bar was the only one I had never heard of, and talk about an unsung hero - I snarfed this at 11:00 am on Monday with a clementine and a cup of coffee and it kept me full until well past 6:00 pm. I only ate my hummus and veggies because I started to feel bad for them.

The Kind bar was the most delicious, probably due to its generous lack of dates, but it also kept me full the longest. It needed to be crumbled up and put in yogurt (apparently you can buy Kind granola which I will be doing) to be an actual full snack.

Larabar wins for having the most appetizing flavor variety. I was torn in the hipster bodega for which sounded the best. I regret not going chocolate. I think that even with the overwhelming after-taste of dates, it would have been worth it.

Normally, I would never spend $2 on anything that isn't slathered in icing and delayed regretful sugar high, but in a pinch it is nice to know that all three of these options could keep me going for most of a day without tasting too healthy to be satisfying.

Monday Meals, victory-ish lap

I had big dreams and high hopes about this final Monday Meal post. I have been rocking this past week like carb-less whoa and have been doing research and development like a real live blogger.

But my day started at 8, and ended at 9:30 and I am just so gd don knowing full well that I'm not done until the powers that be say I am done. 

So without any energy (I will find some tomorrow, I hope) I present you with this week's Monday Meal.

That's right. Champagne. Not just any champagne. Two-day-old champagne. In my favorite monogrammed mason jar. 

I will stab you in the throat if you even think about the fact that champagne might have, like, A carb in it. Shut your life and let me have this.

Monday Meals: On Shame.

This past weekend was rough in the keeping our promises department.

After the victorious weigh in at work last week, and being sick (and therefore pathetic) all weekend I made some slip ups.  In the form of a very small chocolate covered strawberry, two bites of chocolate cake, several bites of blueberry donut, and exactly 5 french fries.

Yikes, dudes.

While all of these things were delicious in their own right, the minute after I ate all of them I was like, "meh, I could have done without that."

Which made it doubly frustrating. Because I had eaten it and immediately was bummed for cheating.

I am just legit missing sweet stuff (the french fries were because my friends were worried I had not eaten enough before drinking on Saturday night and they thought I was going to get sick. So thoughtful, they are).

This is HARD. Its rough. I miss sweet things after lunch and dinner. I miss sweet breakfast. I'm shoveling fruit and gluten-free granola in my gapping maw as a replacement and its super lame.

So we know that this won't be for forever. Which is great. There is no reason it needs to be. But today I come at you on the interwebs from a place of honesty. I do not know how people for-real for-real give up these things and make it seem so easy. It has not been easy. It's been the worst.

Also, real quick, this could not be more #firstworldproblems if it tried. I get that. I need to find real things to complain about eventually. But! For now...

This is super sucky. And today, we're just going to be aware of how hard it is to give up something you love. And then hit the ground running for the next two weeks.

Let's go.

Monday Meals: cravings without the carbs

At this point in the Lent game, I was under the impression that the cravings would have subsided and I would be ready to live a sugar and grain free existence for the rest of my days.

Except not at all. I miss carbs every day. How do people do this for forever? Gah.

But, we are so close (right? RIGHT?) so its just like another three weeks and then waffles All. Day.

Anyway - right now, I am trying to dodge free donuts and savor all the fruit (and wine) that I am allowing myself to eat as "treats."

And I am trying to figure out ways to eat the things I love leaving out the bready-goodness.

Here are three thoughts on some standard craving foods:

Tacos.

Chipotle bowl-style that business. No rice, no shell, and just all the good stuff. You can put it all on a bed of lettuce and call it a "taco salad" if you are feeling really fancy or just give yourself some extra guac and cheese and go to town.

Sandwiches.

I have been relying on this one a fair amount recently. I basically am making turkey sandwiches with cheese instead of bread. The best kept secret of not-sandwiches-sandwiches is to take a piece of the meat and the cheese and roll them up with a slice of avocado in the center. WHAT? You're welcome.  Also, add pickles to things. Just like, eat pickles all the time.

Pizza.

This is a little bit harder, but I was pleasently surprised when I found this recipe for eggplant pizza. I made it last night and it was stupid easy and delighfully delicious. Its important that you let the eggplant sweat for half an hour or so before cooking them. Also, bonus opportunity to play "How does the boiler work?"

It'll be fine! We are going to get through this. We can take away our bread but we can never take away our dignity or our cheese.